Given all the situations going on in the world right now, this is a good time to look at something we usually try to avoid: Suffering.

Many of us look at suffering in two ways. The first is that we can help people by suffering for them, or with them.

Let me explain with a couple of metaphors why this isn’t a good idea.

If your friend or loved one were freezing outside in the pouring rain, getting soaked to the skin, surely your job is not to stand out there to suffer and freeze with them? Doesn’t it make more sense for you to go out there with a good umbrella with which to shelter them, and to lead them to where it’s warm and dry?

Or if a group of people has lost the way in the dark, and they don’t know where to turn, what would help them? To go and join with them in the dark and confusion? Or to go to them with a light that helps them see the way to where they want to go?

When a person is lost and confused, having a pity party with them reinforces the limiting, disempowering belief that “that’s how life is.” How much more empowering, beneficial and useful, to be able to tell that person, with conviction born of your own experience, that they can in fact be happy!

In my book, As You THINK So You Are, it says that “in the compassionate Universe in which we live, suffering can serve a positive purpose.” This may seem counterintuitive, or even ridiculous and cruel. But let’s look at the true purpose of suffering for a moment.

The book goes on to say: “It (suffering) stimulates the urge to change, to clean out, what is negative and useless in ourselves.”

Sometimes we know it would be a good idea to change something about ourselves, but we’re not super motivated to actually make the effort to do it. But Life or the Universe or our Higher Power knows that this change is important for us to become who we really are—magnificent. So it presents us with a problem or challenge tailor-made to our particular weakness.

Now we’re fully awake to the situation, and focused on it, because we have no choice anymore. We move from, “I really ought to do something about that sometime…” to, “I really want to do something about that—NOW.”

And so we change and grow. We become stronger and happier. The Universe has done its job well, and so have we.

The other way to look at suffering is that it’s some kind of punishment.

Looking at suffering as a form of punishment has engendered coldhearted expressions such as “it serves you right.” This comment is intended to heartlessly mean, “You’ve got your just desserts.” But let’s look at it again. “It serves you right…”

This is another way to look at the fact that suffering “stimulates the urge to change, to clean out, what is negative and useless in ourselves.” In other words, suffering serves us well when we’re awake to its true purpose. “It’s an indication of being out of harmony with the higher self, with the Law of being.” (As You THINK So You Are p. 23)

In either of these two scenarios, you can offer far greater service to the one who suffers if you come to them with wisdom, compassion and gladness. You can be the light that gives them hope and a vision of their own happiness.

So please be happy! It’s of great benefit to everyone!

Alexandra Innes is a happiness expert, author and the owner of YummyQuotes.com.