Years ago, before I was blessed with children, I had an opportunity to spend a wonderful week of holiday on the NSW ski slopes with my husband. He had learned to ski as a child, and was capable of skiing 'black' runs, whilst I had never skied before. We decided that I would take 2-hour lessons each morning with an instructor, and then we'd meet up at lunch time and ski the 'easier' slopes together in the afternoon.

I picked up the skills required fairly quickly, and with my ski instructor or my husband by my side to supervise me I showed a great deal of confidence and ability. By the end of the week, after 10 hours of instruction, my lessons were over. I had some time before I was to meet my husband for lunch, so I decided to tackle a slightly harder ski run on my own.

There was a T-bar lift on a slope which I'd been skiing for most of the week. During lessons my instructor and I would disembark at a flat level half way up the slope. There was another flat level further up, followed by a steep rise to the peak. I decided to venture up to the higher flat level and disembark.

When I approached the second flat level I called out to the two gentlemen ahead of me on the T-bar to let them know I was disembarking, and to be aware that my T-bar may swing towards them. It was unlikely, but I decided to warn them as a courtesy. Their response both surprised and intimidated me: "If your bar hits me," said one man, "I'll sue you!" I gulped. The other man scowled, "You shouldn't be on this lift if you can't cope with the slope!" So, rather than disembark I found my skis angling upwards as I continued on the steep slope to the peak. Read more ...

How would your results as a leader change if you spent a little extra time to explain a new workplace policy or project outcome?  Do you use 'orientating statements' so that your staff understand the expected process of a meeting at its commencement?  How often do you use a tone of 'dominance' in the workplace, and what impact does that tone have on your direct reports?  Do you believe that a tone of dominance engenders respect?  What would it mean to you to use a tone of contemplation and understanding when your direct reports raise their concerns about a project?

Research has shown that it can make tens of thousands - if not millions - of dollars of difference.

Psychologist Nalini Ambady conducted research that examined 40 seconds of filmed conversation between hundreds of doctors and two of each of their patients, and was able to accurately predict whether the doctor had been sued for malpractice.  The quality of the information given by the doctors did not vary, they gave the same amount of information about the patients' conditions and medications; in fact, Ambady went further to remove the content of the conversations, so that only pitch, intonation, volume and rhythm remained. 

Using the content-filtered 40-second video clips, Ambady asked independent judges to rate the sound of the doctors speaking for qualities - hostility, warmth, humour, dominance, anxiousness, etc.  The quality which correlated most with those doctors who had been sued for malpractice was the tone of 'dominance', and those doctors who were least likely to have been sued were those who were assessed as having used a tone of 'concern'.  So it wasn't what the doctors said, it was how the doctors said it that made it possible to predict who had been sued in the past. Read more ...

My 15 years as a psychologist has informed my coaching style, particularly my understanding that our conscious influence on our behaviour is limited and constantly buffetted by our unconscious processes (memories, emotions, thoughts, beliefs, values and identity).

As an example, a sales coach who comes with sales expertise as their coaching background may be hired to coach a salesperson in communication and rapport strategies.  This usually involves teaching a particular skill or strategy, and some form of behavioural or cognitive rehearsal.  However, in many cases coachees already know 'what' to do, but are unable to overcome their 'reluctance' to do it.  They often can't articulate from where that reluctance stems.  It may be that the coachee unconsciously de-values the service of selling.  This is an unconscious value until it is brought to the conscious attention of the coachee, just as memories are stored unconsciously until such time as we call upon them (recall them). 

Unconscious values, beliefs, emotions, memories and even identity statements (eg "I am a graduate", or "I am a mother") impact on our behaviours, and therefore our results.  So even the coachee who is taught communication strategies to improve their sales results will find it difficult to implement them if he/she also has unconscious belief "great salespeople are only in it for themselves", or they don't value money, or they have a very unfavourable memory of a sales experience, or their identity statements do not support their sales role.  It is not the skills that need to be taught in this situation, it is a shift in the unconscious processes that needs to be achieved.

Hence, the iceberg model of coaching. Read more ...

Are you overwhelmed with feelings of stress?  How often do you resort to anger in your reactions?  Is self-pity or sadness your 'go-to' emotion when faced with challenges?  If this sounds familiar you may need to be aware of the impact of these patterns. 

If you really want to address these habits, your task is to be aware of the emotional state you’re choosing to experience.  When a negative event occurs (eg, you get a speeding ticket in the mail, you hear about a problem that is going to have a direct impact on your results, you discover you need to work late on the night you planned to have drinks with a friend) thousands of neurons fire off in your brain.  At the same time, you create an emotional state (frustration, annoyance, helplessness, stress) and fire other neurons.  Those neurons that ‘fire together’ begin to ‘wire together’.  What does this mean?  This means that whenever you experience those negative events the neurons that fire will also trigger the emotional states.  When this happens often enough the neurological pathway created in the brain changes from a “small walking track” to a “major highway”.  This results in the reaction occurring faster and with more velocity. 

When these thoughts are triggered and are sent down the neuron super highway, your brain is also sending signals to your glands to release certain hormones that are associated with emotion.  These hormones attach themselves to your body's cells via 'receptors', and once attached the body experiences the sensation of that emotion (happiness, stress, anxiety, hunger, etc).  Read more ...

Are you overwhelmed with feelings of stress?  How often do you resort to anger in your reactions?  Is self-pity or sadness your 'go-to' emotion when faced with challenges?  If this sounds familiar you may need to be aware of the impact of these patterns. 

If you really want to address these habits, your task is to be aware of the emotional state you’re choosing to experience.  When a negative event occurs (eg, you get a speeding ticket in the mail, you hear about a problem that is going to have a direct impact on your results, you discover you need to work late on the night you planned to have drinks with a friend) thousands of neurons fire off in your brain.  At the same time, you create an emotional state (frustration, annoyance, helplessness, stress) and fire other neurons.  Those neurons that ‘fire together’ begin to ‘wire together’.  What does this mean?  This means that whenever you experience those negative events the neurons that fire will also trigger the emotional states.  When this happens often enough the neurological pathway created in the brain changes from a “small walking track” to a “major highway”.  This results in the reaction occurring faster and with more velocity. 

When these thoughts are triggered and are sent down the neuron super highway, your brain is also sending signals to your glands to release certain hormones that are associated with emotion.  These hormones attach themselves to your body's cells via 'receptors', and once attached the body experiences the sensation of that emotion (happiness, stress, anxiety, hunger, etc).  Read more ...

Are you overwhelmed with feelings of stress?  How often do you resort to anger in your reactions?  Is self-pity or sadness your 'go-to' emotion when faced with challenges?  If this sounds familiar you may need to be aware of the impact of these patterns. 

If you really want to address these habits, your task is to be aware of the emotional state you’re choosing to experience.  When a negative event occurs (eg, you get a speeding ticket in the mail, you hear about a problem that is going to have a direct impact on your results, you discover you need to work late on the night you planned to have drinks with a friend) thousands of neurons fire off in your brain.  At the same time, you create an emotional state (frustration, annoyance, helplessness, stress) and fire other neurons.  Those neurons that ‘fire together’ begin to ‘wire together’.  What does this mean?  This means that whenever you experience those negative events the neurons that fire will also trigger the emotional states.  When this happens often enough the neurological pathway created in the brain changes from a “small walking track” to a “major highway”.  This results in the reaction occurring faster and with more velocity. 

When these thoughts are triggered and are sent down the neuron super highway, your brain is also sending signals to your glands to release certain hormones that are associated with emotion.  These hormones attach themselves to your body's cells via 'receptors', and once attached the body experiences the sensation of that emotion (happiness, stress, anxiety, hunger, etc).  Read more ...

Are you overwhelmed with feelings of stress?  How often do you resort to anger in your reactions?  Is self-pity or sadness your 'go-to' emotion when faced with challenges?  If this sounds familiar you may need to be aware of the impact of these patterns. 

If you really want to address these habits, your task is to be aware of the emotional state you’re choosing to experience.  When a negative event occurs (eg, you get a speeding ticket in the mail, you hear about a problem that is going to have a direct impact on your results, you discover you need to work late on the night you planned to have drinks with a friend) thousands of neurons fire off in your brain.  At the same time, you create an emotional state (frustration, annoyance, helplessness, stress) and fire other neurons.  Those neurons that ‘fire together’ begin to ‘wire together’.  What does this mean?  This means that whenever you experience those negative events the neurons that fire will also trigger the emotional states.  When this happens often enough the neurological pathway created in the brain changes from a “small walking track” to a “major highway”.  This results in the reaction occurring faster and with more velocity. 

When these thoughts are triggered and are sent down the neuron super highway, your brain is also sending signals to your glands to release certain hormones that are associated with emotion.  These hormones attach themselves to your body's cells via 'receptors', and once attached the body experiences the sensation of that emotion (happiness, stress, anxiety, hunger, etc).  Read more ...

In recent weeks I've been interested in the differences in masculine and feminine energy.  Let me say up front that masculine and feminine energy does not necessarily correlate with male and female gender.  A female in the workplace can (and often does) adopt a masculine energy in her approach to managerial or leadership roles. 

Masculine energy is driven, powerful, result-focused, directive, and task-oriented.  Feminine energy is typified by a more peaceful and intuitive approach, is relationship-focused, collaborative and supportive.  Remember, I'm not describing men and women here, I'm describing the energy with which we approach leadership roles.

Most men and most women tend to adopt a masculine approach to their leadership function or executive function in the workplace.  Perhaps this is because the boardroom was traditionally a male domain where masculine energy abounded, so that when females began to find their way into this echelon it was the result of having adopted this energetic style, or they quickly learned to develop this style when introduced at this level.

What is of interest to me, however, is that when examining the kind of leader behaviours that influence affective commitment from employees (the desire to achieve organisational goals because they feel a sense of belonging and identity with the organisation), behaviours that are associated more with feminine energy become important.

Research that I recently conducted with an Australian organisation of over 25,000 employees shows some of the most highly correlated leader behaviours in relation to organisational commitment using the acronyms RELATE and LEAD.  Examine these for yourself and consider whether you feel that the behaviour demonstrates more masculine energy or more feminine energy.

R = Respect the individuals on your team Read more ...

For many years it has been recognised that the relationships we establish within the workplace influence many workplace variables, such as job satisfaction, job performance, retention and productivity.  Managers becoming coaches is one example of leveraging the impact of relationships in the workplace.  Team building days have become popular due to their link with increased communication between departments, higher levels of productivity and enhanced job satisfaction.

But, what happens out of the workplace is none of your business, right?

What if I told you that an estimated USD$6,000,000,000 is lost in productivity and revenue in the US each year as a result of hardship in personal relationships?  What if I told you that a lack of spousal support for one's job is consistently ranked in the top three reasons for leaving a workplace?  What if you knew that retention could be influenced by providing an employee assistance program which incorporated relationship coaching?  If an employee had fewer emotional distractions, could this result in a safer workplace?

As I think about these questions, my mind wanders to those jobs that place the greatest demands on relationships - those including shift work or long periods of time away from home.  These jobs also seem to be the ones where additional stressors and strains could mean the difference between getting the job completed safely and on time, or not.

Late in 2010, Queensland mining magnate Clive Palmer gifted the majority of his employees a family holiday to exotic South Pacific islands for Christmas.  This is a very savvy move for an employer, making him an Employer of Choice in my mind, and demonstrates Mr Palmer's understanding of the demands that the mining industry places on families.  How many employers are pro-actively investing in their employees' family stability at such broad levels? Read more ...

For many years it has been recognised that the relationships we establish within the workplace influence many workplace variables, such as job satisfaction, job performance, retention and productivity.  Managers becoming coaches is one example of leveraging the impact of relationships in the workplace.  Team building days have become popular due to their link with increased communication between departments, higher levels of productivity and enhanced job satisfaction.

But, what happens out of the workplace is none of your business, right?

What if I told you that an estimated USD$6,000,000,000 is lost in productivity and revenue in the US each year as a result of hardship in personal relationships?  What if I told you that a lack of spousal support for one's job is consistently ranked in the top three reasons for leaving a workplace?  What if you knew that retention could be influenced by providing an employee assistance program which incorporated relationship coaching?  If an employee had fewer emotional distractions, could this result in a safer workplace?

As I think about these questions, my mind wanders to those jobs that place the greatest demands on relationships - those including shift work or long periods of time away from home.  These jobs also seem to be the ones where additional stressors and strains could mean the difference between getting the job completed safely and on time, or not.

Late in 2010, Queensland mining magnate Clive Palmer gifted the majority of his employees a family holiday to exotic South Pacific islands for Christmas.  This is a very savvy move for an employer, making him an Employer of Choice in my mind, and demonstrates Mr Palmer's understanding of the demands that the mining industry places on families.  How many employers are pro-actively investing in their employees' family stability at such broad levels? Read more ...